I've been arguing for the past couple of days with a friend of mine about the recent demise of her relationship. I have a tendency to be a bit too blunt and harsh (even my mother feels that way about me) so I couldn't stop myself from telling her that she's fairly boring.
As she explained to me the way the relationship devolved from him being interested and always trying to learn more about her into him more or less not caring, I had to let her know that he got bored with her. At some point she was interesting and new but over time she stopped being that way. Either she quit trying to be interesting or she plain ran out of that thing that keeps guys around.
To be fair, calling somebody boring is a bit rude. And truly, it might not even be accurate. Boring is a relative thing, depending on the guy. Guys like myself need constant mental gymnastics
to stay involved. Others might not like mental challenges. It completely depends on your subject. And for the record, I do not think women should be out there breaking their necks trying to please some guy because he seems to be losing interest. If he isn't making attempts to keep you interested too, drop him. Period.
But the main point is this, in life, the people with the most interesting stories or hobbies or just things that separate them from other people are the ones folks tend to be attracted to. Lumps on the wall? Not so much. I realize its a pretty general concept, but hell, Steve Harvey is a New York Times Best Selling author and he wrote a book that basically said, men and women are different.
Here are a few things that usually keep guys attention:
1) Interesting hobbies. Most guys, though fairly simple (machines, things that go vroom, and football
) might be more interested in learning about new things than you think. My own girlfriend (Father forgive me for what I'm about to divulge) has gotten me hooked on HGTV and Project Runway. Mind you, I haven't the least bit of interest in fashion or design, but I know what's ugly and what isn't. She introduced me to something I never thought in a million years I'd be interested in; now we watch and judge these designs on a regular basis. Together.
2) Know about stuff that we tend to be the expert on. Some men REALLY like to be able to have intelligent conversations with their chicks about things they love. I'm a music junkie, snob, and producer. My girl loves music so we can argue about the new stuff without me feeling like she's forcing the issue. I love that about her. Plus, it helps that she knows the difference between Miley Cyrus and Portishead. Me love her long time.
Those are just two means for staying interesting. Keep it in mind and the world can be your oyster.
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